Not gonna take it

Fuck, they're outside my window again. No, I'm not going to join you, stay away from the window. George, stay away from the window.

I'm typing because how else is anyone going to hear the screaming? How else are you going to know, dad, that this is your damn fault.

I know I can beat this, I'm smart enough, that's why I'm here, right? Or was it just because I was never good enough for you, dad? If I had been better, if I had been worthy of your great, fantastic goddamn perfectness, would you have done this to me? Oh god you monster, you're as bad as they are. No, you're worse, dad, you're worse, because they got twisted and they didn't have a choice and their blood is on your hands and you've always had a choice you black and contorted corkscrew of a hellion, you sick, terrible, horrible entity. I hate you dad I hate you you you

I'm happy so happy 

The world is full of enough grotesquely cute and obsessively happy things to stave you away and to keep me happy, dad. The monster can't get me nothing is ever gonna get me again because I'm so goddamn happy, you hear me? So HAPPY. 

It's them. Again. Infection, I can taste it. Oh god. They aren't what they are, beckoning me to come and play, but I don't want to, it's not time. Please don't let me be that, god fuck christ no.

I can beat this, I'm stronger than this, I'll fucking show you I that am.


  1. Cute cat pic are a good distraction, especially on the internet.


  2. Hi Charlie, this might not be the best time, but what gender are you?

  3. Don't give in to George and the others Charlie! Stay true to your individualism! Be yourself!
    Don't let the rest of the world bring you down.

  4. Cute! So cute and loud and repeating and go louder. Can you make it go louder? Can you ple,ase make it go louder?

    But oh god why would that matter. I can still hear it and i don't know what I'm hearingg it's not screaming or the soudn of a baby crying but it makes yoiu hurt in the same way and

    and M/F that's exactly what dad said when he kicked me out but LOOK AT ME NOW! I'm at the top of fucking something, right? Everyone else is dead so I'm in charge, haha, in charge of this whole horrible bleeding monstrous dark grisly place which, right?

    But the rest of the world is what's bringing me up, it's just what's outside that's bringing me down. and goddamnit that's what he said.